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Sausage Life!

The column which beats as it sweeps as it cleans GLOBAL WARNING?The continent of Australia, already devastated by unprecedented bush fires, is now apparently on the brink of running out of question marks. Our antipodean correspondent Kylie O’Reilly spoke to…
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Sausage Life

The column which mumbles incoherently in order to get away with murder. READER: I know we agreed never to discuss religious matters on here…MYSELF: Or : …but as a recovering Catholic, do you approve of women bishops?MYSELF: No, I am…
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Sausage Life

The column which throws stones even though it lives in a glass house READER: Happy New Year!MYSELF:  For whom?READER: What’s up now, Dr. Doom?MYSELF:  Er…the election result?READER: Oh the election! I’d quite forgotten about that! Anyway, have you seen Cats…
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The column which believes that marzipan is from Mars and vermicelli is from Venus  MYSELF: Blimey, have you seen the pier lately? It’s turning into a : Are you referring to the newly installed log cabins?MYSELF: No, the ones I…
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Sausage Life!

The column that puts its brolly up even though it isn’t raining READER: I see Boris is finally getting his point across at : In what way exactly is the PM finally getting his point across? And please stop calling…
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Sausage Life!

The column which reserves the right to record your calls for training porpoises READER: Whoops! Bit of a typo there!MYSELF: What do you mean?READER: Up there, under your name. Porpoises. I think you meant purposesMYSELF:  Not at all. On top…
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Sausage Life

The column that self inflates, but is difficult to get back in the bag MYSELF: What are you doing up there?READER: I’m conducting an :  Well seeing as you’re on top of a stepladder, would you mind removing that cobweb…
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Sausage Life!

The column that believes in the right to wear a hat, even when it is unnecessary WARRIOR’S WOESNewly relegated Hastings & St Leonards Warriors were beaten 8-0 away by Cockmarlin Thunderbolts last Saturday, their fifth 8-0 defeat in five games.…
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Sausage Life!

The column that thinks there’s nothing beats a good cigar after a bit of arson MYSELF: How do you feel about the EU, now that we’re in the middle of a constitutional crisis?READER: What constitutional crisis? Is there a constitutional…
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