Politikal Pokes By Lobbytroll
ANY OLD IRONY He doesn’t drink alcohol because it clouds his brain. His only known vices are Big Macs, long ties, Fox News, the acquisition of money rather than wealth, the magic mirror which tells him he is beautiful, and…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
AS IF WE WEREN’T CONFUSED ENOUGH After the Spanish civil war, the British government took urgent action, aware that the aerial bombing of civilians was highly likely to occur should war with Germany be declared. Prompted by the very real…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
CORONA – LATEST GOVERNMENT ADVICE Sombre military music. A man with strange hair enters a badly-lit studio and in a low monotone, recites these words from an autocue: Things are going to get difficult, yes. But in these troubled times,…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
Trying to keep down appearances A PLAGUE OF LOCUMSArmies of retired GPs are to be marshalled in order to cope with Covid-19. Dubbed Dad’s Doctors their efficacy has been thrown into doubt by GP leaders who have warned that retired doctors…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
‘OL BLUE EYES IS BACK I thank The Albion’s Bob Tipler who passed on this absolute gem of a music agency press release, which manages to paint a tantalising picture of an artiste, whilst avoiding all the rules of grammar, syntax…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
FORGERY Boris Johnson is determined to “forge a new Britain”, once we Get Brexit Done, a phrase so stupid it defies satire. Brexit will not ‘get done’, because Brexit is an abstract noun, invented to disguise something hideously complicated as…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
MORONITYThe Trump brand is so toxic in the UK that even stupid people have stopped liking him, but in the US, certain sectors of the TV-reared population lap it all up. Former head of Isis, Abu Bakhur, evaded capture by…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
BIG BROTHER IS WATCHING YOU SQUIRMSajid Javid, owner of the most insincere face outside of Boris Johnson’s, is, it seems, quite prepared to say absolutely anything in order to be included in the post-brexit dystopian nightmare dictatorship envisaged by Dominic…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
HOW TO IGNORE PRAGMATISM AND STAMPEDE OVER THE CLIFF LIKE PROPER LEMMINGSSince the UK’s quiet little right-wing coup has taken over Downing Street, we have noticed an alarming trend in online opinion-stirring which goes something like this: “It’s all a waste…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
HAIR HITLERIf you don’t recognise the boiling resentment of 1933 Germany being reflected in this evil gang of swivel-eyed villains, the engineers of a coup that has just taken over the government of the UK, then you are blind, mad,…