Features

Sausage Life

The column which believes that in the country of the bland, the one-idea’d man is king READER: Did you see the amazing photo of the black hole?MYSELF:  I saw it. A very good : Oh come on, don’t pretend you’re…
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Features

Sausage Life

The column which believes that what you lack in empathy you can more than make up for with spiteful malice  MYSELF: Why the short face? READER: I’m so excited I can’t wait. I’ve just taken out a subscription to Sky TV’s…
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Features

Sausage Life

The column which believes that although Cod does exist, some chips are fake  MYSELF: Brexit is beginning to feel like a painful case of recurring haemorrhoids. I sense that we are all about to be engulfed by an avalanche of…
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Features

Sausage Life

The column which thinks that facts are merely irritating obstacles blocking the road to truth MYSELF: I’m trying to find out who are the world’s most punchable people. That is to say, those whose ubiquitous inventions are neither use nor…
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Features

Sausage Life

The column which thinks that in a desert, even a mirage is a relief READER: So what did you do for Valentine’s Day?MYSELF: Oh, the usual. The night before, I had my friend Banksy stencil a satirical depiction of the…
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Features

Sausage Life

The column which asks: why aren’t children allowed to join the House of Commons straight from school? READER: I thought they already : It was a rhetorical question. MYTHBUSTERSThe truth behind some popular misconceptions  MYTH: Money is an essential ingredient…
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