Sausage Life
The column which believes that in the country of the bland, the one-idea’d man is king READER: Did you see the amazing photo of the black hole?MYSELF: I saw it. A very good : Oh come on, don’t pretend you’re…
Politikal Pokes By Lobbytroll
IT’S THE STUPIDITY, STUPIDAs embarrassing to the UK as Brexit is, nothing causes foreign visitors’ jaws to drop more than the flag-draped, cerebrally challenged rabble currently camped outside the Houses of Parliament. With their cretinous football chants, moronic slogans and…
Sausage Life
The column which believes that what you lack in empathy you can more than make up for with spiteful malice MYSELF: Why the short face? READER: I’m so excited I can’t wait. I’ve just taken out a subscription to Sky TV’s…
Sausage Life
The column which believes that although Cod does exist, some chips are fake MYSELF: Brexit is beginning to feel like a painful case of recurring haemorrhoids. I sense that we are all about to be engulfed by an avalanche of…
Politikal Pokes by Lobbytroll
FROG MARCHNigel Farage, desperately channelling the Jarrow marchers of 1936, put up a message on his Facebook page accompanied by a photo of him in his used car salesman coat and spiv hat. Looking pie-eyed and clutching his trademark man-of-the-people…
Sausage Life
The column which thinks that facts are merely irritating obstacles blocking the road to truth MYSELF: I’m trying to find out who are the world’s most punchable people. That is to say, those whose ubiquitous inventions are neither use nor…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
A QUESTION OF TRUSSA few years ago, a tear in the fabric of the space-time continuum occurred, and through this portal fell Liz Truss, former resident of a parallel universe. This happy (for her) accident coincided with a government inclusivity…
Sausage Life
The column which thinks that in a desert, even a mirage is a relief READER: So what did you do for Valentine’s Day?MYSELF: Oh, the usual. The night before, I had my friend Banksy stencil a satirical depiction of the…
Sausage Life
The column which asks: why aren’t children allowed to join the House of Commons straight from school? READER: I thought they already : It was a rhetorical question. MYTHBUSTERSThe truth behind some popular misconceptions MYTH: Money is an essential ingredient…
Politikal Pokes by lobbytroll
BERTS OF A FEATHEROn January 26th there was a meeting between Amber Rudd and all interested parties concerning the extended closure of Hastings pier. At the meeting, pier owner Mr Abid Gulzar’s team, after being challenged about the dearth of…